My experience with pornography site.
I had never really thought a time would come when I will be alone in my room, no friends to talk with and my thoughts would spin our of control. Maybes being childish or I was yet to master my ability to stay alone.
During the lockdown, I faced several challenges, my weakness that I thought I had dealt with began to resurface. I was almost sliding into depression. Pornograhy and it’s right hand man masturbation was luring me into their hands due to boredorm.
With so much time at my disposal, the thought of pornography became a top chat and all I could see it as, was the most deceptive way to kill the boredom but little did I know I was overtaken by an enemy I had once won.
And just like every weakness, it crept in back slowly to me and in no time it became a usual stuff. I would go into my room lock myself up and indulge in the disgusting act, I’ll come out clean as no one knows.
Driven my the strength of this force, i even went as far as registering and subscribing on a porn site. I thought to myself “one time subscription is okay”, a couple of dollars won’t cause a bite but what I didn’t know was that onces in, forever in, they will keep on charging me as each day passed, so it was kinda a lifetime subscription.
The way back
Fastfoward to Some days later, I got sober and ashamed of my indulgence, i turned to God as my final resort, then I hurried to delete my account on the porn site and unsubscribe from the newsletters I previously subscribed to with the thought that by doing so my card won’t be charged again. Little did I know it was a some kinda of continuous charge.
I let it all go and began to trust God and seek his face to keep me, though I still had urges but with sobering face i would ask the Holy Spirit to help me overcome. Days and weeks has passed and I am still firm in the love of God but something disheartening happened after some time which I will keep regretting.
The private firm I work with had sent half my salary in my account for the month of April seeing we didn’t work for that month. The money was meant to cover for transportation to work and other expenses I may have for the month of May. I was glad when i received the pay and at the same time hopeful my money would be intact, knowing that I didn’t really unsubscribe my card details from the porn site (before deleting my account).
A day passed after receiving my pay and without a debit alert, I was beginning to think maybe I did actually unsubscribe well from the site. I was confident my money was untouchable but few hours later I was shocked, I got a debit of over Eleven Thousand naira (#11,100). At first I was perplexed at what had happened, how was my money debited, only to check my transaction history and discovered I was being charged an accumulated fee by the porn site which I no longer have connections with.
I sank in thoughts, of how just one experiment landed me here. 11k might not be a big deal but considering how I got into it in the first place was torturing, what can i do? Is the question that ran into my mind, I can’t go back to the site to unsubscribe my card details seen that I have deleted my account.
I got awaken to the Sad reality of my falling into pornography and her accomplice, for as long as my bank account remains active, they will keep on charging me, even though I had deleted my account with them.
So the only option available was to deactivate my bank account and change my salary bank details and keep holding on to the love of God and his grace to sustain me from falling again.
I have learnt my lesson and now know the harm pornograhy can cause in a man’s life. For even far beyond the expensive nature of it, the defiling of your body is unimaginable. So many experience to share but it’s my prayers that God gives you Victor over pornography.
A true experience